Sunday, 1 July 2012

The Rude Clues

When my Cryptic Crosswords For Dummies book was being checked by the American editors at Wiley, they decided that my handful of risqué clues couldn't stay in. So I edited the offending 11 clues to tame them down.

But it's a pity to see such naughtiness go to waste. So I thought you'd like to have a try of them here! I've put the puzzle reference in, too, so you can find the edited versions in the book (which should be available in bookshops in a few weeks now).

As ever, my chihuahuas Petal and Griff are the Guardians of the Answers. Have a good try of the clues yourself, and scroll below the pups to see full explanations of the clues, and the answers.


The (Slightly) Rude Clues

1. Rampantly sexy, without a kiss? Absolutely! (3)
Crossword 5, 21 Down, pg 36

2. Mesmerist has weird phony tits (9)
Crossword 15, 1 Across, pg 56

3. Naughty escort's laced undergarment (6) 
Crossword 24, 24 Across, pg 74

4. 101 in advertisement for tart (4) 
Crossword 26, 27 Down, pg 80

5. Mischievously eyed girl ravenously (8) 
Crossword 30, 3 Down, pg 88

6. Make noises in bed, in pain around midday! (5) 
Crossword 33, 20 Across, pg 94

7. Topless tenant gets to cross the threshold (5) 
Crossword 38, 11 Down, pg 104

8. Jenny and I go, mischievously loving (8) 
Crossword 40, 11 Across, pg 108

9. Five engaged in awkward caresses lead to rifts (9) 
Crossword 43, 1 Across, pg 114

10. Call girls' pastries (5) 
Crossword 43, 24 Across, pg 114

11. Very well, tints without top on (3)
Crossword 45, 28 Across, pg 120

Griff and Petal on their way to the dog park, in their FidoRido seat

Explanations / Hints

1. Rampantly sexy, without a kiss? Absolutely! (3) 
Absolutely is the definition in this clue. Rampantly is an anagram indicator, and sexy is the anagram fodder, but without a kiss (the letter X).

2. Mesmerist has weird phony tits (9) 
Weird is an anagram indicator. Phony tits is the anagram fodder; jumbling them up will give you a synonym for mesmerist.

3. Naughty escort's laced undergarment (6) 
Another anagram ... naughty is the anagram indicator, escort is the anagram fodder. The apostrophe s is not included in the anagram here, it is saying "A naughty version of escort IS another word for laced undergarment".

4. 101 in advertisement for tart (4) 
Remember your Roman numerals here! 101 = CI. An advertisement is an AD. So put CI in AD, for a word that means tart (as an adjective).

5. Mischievously eyed girl ravenously (8) 
Another anagram, indicated by mischievously. Eyed girl is the anagram fodder. Ravenously is the definition.

6. Make noises in bed, in pain around midday! (5) 
Make noises in bed is the definition here. In pain = SORE. Put these letters around an abbreviation for midday (noon = N).

7. Topless tenant gets to cross the threshold (5) 
This is a deletion clue, indicated by topless. What is topless? A tenant, or RENTER. The definition is cross the threshold

8. Jenny and I go, mischievously loving (8) 
Mischievously indicates an anagram. The letters of Jenny plus (and) I go are the fodder, and loving is the definition.

9. Five engaged in awkward caresses lead to rifts (9) 
Five is another indication of a Roman numeral. So five = V. It is engaged in (or put in) an awkward version (anagram) of caresses. Rifts is a noun, and the definition.

10. Call girls' pastries (5) 
Double definition clue here. What are both call girls, and pastries?

11. Very well, tints without top on (3) 
Very well is the definition. Another word for tints is DYES. Without top on, means to delete the first letter from DYES.


Answers

1. YES
2. HYPNOTIST
3. CORSET
4. ACID
5. GREEDILY
6. SNORE
7. ENTER
8. ENJOYING
9. CREVASSES
10. TARTS
11. YES (again!)

Did you get through them all without blushing?!

10 comments:

  1. I was trying to come up with something pithy to say about the 'censorship' applied to your work on behalf of those frail cryptitioners who need to complain about such goings on in their clues, but then I worried that 'pithy' might have connotations I'm not aware of.
    So no clues about tarts, eh? I myself am very fond of the occasional lashing of meringue. OOPS.

    ReplyDelete
  2. You won't believe it. My authorization word ended in 'bum'. How I laughed.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Brilliant! LOL!

    I suspect that American editorial policy is more prudish than the American population at large, and the Commonwealth audience (which is the main audience for the books, after all). Ah well.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I love your twisted sense of humor. You could think your way through corkscrew in a tornado.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I really enjoyed these, even without the puzzle they should have been in. And I can't imagine why they felt such good (and amusing) clues should be taken out.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
    2. Thank you. Yes, I was rather miffed that the USA team felt the need to remove them. They seem to take the line of trying not to maybe offend *anyone* at all, which includes the most prudish old maid you can imagine :/

      (Previous comment deleted because I don't appear to be able to write proper English at this time of the morning ;)

      Delete
  6. You should have had extremely violent clues because they are OK, it's very puritanical of them. And silly I think.
    I also think Petal is giving Griff the evil eye because she covets his jumper!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, I think it was a rather silly decision too ...

      It's Griff (the fluffy one) giving Petal (the black and white one) the evil eye ... although, it must be said that he *hates* wearing puppeh clothes (not that he needs them, all that fur keeps him warm)! LOL :)

      Delete

Note: only a member of this blog may post a comment.